This has been a very difficult week for me. Most of my posts are about plants, what a great job I have and how beautiful the world is. Underneath, simmering, is a well of frustration and fear. And on Monday, I snapped.
I was driving home from the Valley on the 101 through the Caheunga Pass. The car in front of me swerved and I saw something small and brown in the road so I swerved as well. Just as I was passing, I realized that it was a duck, frantic, with one small baby running around and several others smashed into the dividing line. The duck was in complete terror and confusion and they were in between lanes with no way of getting back to the edge. There was traffic and no way for me to stop; we were going 70 mph and to stop was impossible. I had to keep going.
My main thought was that I hate us, I hate humans. I hate us for creating such dangerous and destructive items. Roads and cars where innocent animals blunder upon them and are completely destroyed. Nuclear power plants that poison our waters and soils, oil rigs that drown animals and plants in millions of gallons of oil. Islands of trash that float in the middle of the oceans to choke and poison. The holes in the ozone from carcinogens that get pumped into the atmosphere. Strip mining.
And don't forget what we do to each other! War and torture and rape; leaders killing their citizens, countries fighting over beliefs and borders and resources. And the politics in our country, I don't ever remember them being this bad. The fighting and insults and anger. All thrown around on twitter and blogs and sound bites - 24 hours a day. I cant stand it anymore.
I am frightened, I admit it. Doesn't everyone realize that once we fuck up this planet, there is no other place to go! The destruction of our natural habitat is non-partisan, it affects everyone. There is no get out of jail card for this one.
Why that one duck, that one moment, I don't know. I think it just was that last straw that I could bear. How is it the people get up out of bed everyday? Go to work, eat ice cream? Throw trash on the street and pour used oil into the storm drain? Put garbage into the green waste bin...
All week I myself have gone to work, walked my dog, chatted with my neighbor. I have put gas in my car and bought a sandwich wrapped in plastic. But all week I have been heartsick. Wondering how to deal with this, what to do. And I have no answer
It dose not surprise me that such an awful site would strike a cord with you. You are quite correct in your observation that it all seems to be falling apart, because it is. The difference is that you actually see it while most people go about their lives with little or no concern for what is happening around them. Although what you see is nothing short of scary, count yourself as one of those on the right side of history because seeing the world as you do also puts you in a position to affect change. No matter how small or great that change may be you are among the few who actually see the duck crossing the road and have the presences of mind to not only swerve to avoid doing harm, but also to feel the tragedy of that moment and take action in your own beautiful way. Funny how a relatively small event can redirect and refocus our sense of humanity. Congratulations to you Kate!
ReplyDeletePS: You should consider some minor gramatical refinements and then send it to some magazines or websites to be posted for others to read. It's that good and that moving and is a step closer to your goal of being published. Just a thought.
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Point VERY well made and I can totally relate!!! To keep my sanity, I HAVE to believe that like the one drop in a pond that sends out many ripples, each one of us can make a positive a difference one person - one conscious action at a time.
ReplyDeleteHere's to your message helping to raise that consciousness so that all who read it start to think and start to behave in ways that make a positive difference!!!
Thank you VERY much for writing this :)